Catchin' Up
A trip across the pond (Week 3)
OSC Joel Wifler
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Relatively an uneventful day kicked off week three. Did some laundry, assisted one of my fellow Chief’s with administrative paperwork, stood the phone watch. Then the proverbial [expletive deleted] hit the fan at dinner time with a communications deficiency that could only be corrected with some overtime on my end. It’s now 0051 and well past my bed time.
After a long night of “piss poor planning on your end, evidently constituted an emergency on my end” turned out to be a lack communications. Needless to say it was all for naught. Chalk this episode up with another of my “Break glass when needed” theory. Throughout my career, I’ve often thought of myself in a glass box and whenever the emergent need arises, someone breaks the glass and I go into action. What’s next?
It’s surprising that today slowed way down. I spent my morning with a little office house cleaning. Organizing the in/out box, destroying old files, deciding what to keep and where to put it, a fairly light morning. It’s my mother’s birthday today (11JUN), but I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to call her. As a member of the Damage Control Training Team, I had the pleasure of following our investigators around the ship and into the engine room this afternoon for a flooding drill. I should note that I make it a point of never going into the engine room of the ship when the engines & generators are running. It’s too damn loud, and too damn hot for my tastes. Afterwards, I received a fair amount of ribbing from some other Chief’s about my journey into the bowels of the ship. A meeting of all Honorable Shellbacks was held after our drill. Plans are in the making and the “WOG’s” are getting antsy. Dinner tonight was one of my fav’s. BBQ Pulled pork, black eyed peas, and tater salad. Sort of reminds me of Chuck town.
Have you ever had one of those mornings where you awoke, did your daily routine, had a cup of coffee and wanted to crawl back into bed? That’s how this morning started. After lunch I received my surprise of the day: “Chief, we accidentally dropped a screwdriver in the disintegrator”. You can only imagine the expletives I wanted to drop, but all that came out was a loud “WHAT”? Luckily, it was repaired…I’d hate to have to form an ole’ fashion burn party. Oh the humanity. Phone watch again; although, this really isn’t a “watch” per say, more like escort duty. I happen to be on the access list, so I’m “posted” here to escort all who can take advantage of this “morale tool”. I’ve had my Kit-Kat, and am about halfway thru my Joe with 1 ½ hrs to go.
Becce showed up this morning in her unpopular, unhindered state to try and get the best of our engineers below. I don’t think she ate her Wheaties for breakfast though, as our teams triumphed over her pranks most expeditiously. I’ve been enjoying the sunny skies and the way the heat forms on the back of my neck when I’m outside, but I still can’t find my sunglasses. I know for a fact that I brought them on board, I just can’t locate them. It may be time to purchase more polo’s from the store.
Apparently, a substantial amount of the crew did some late night work, as I awoke to having the day off. Thanks y’all. Looking forward to substituting in a late night spades game that will undoubtedly go on until 4AM. I’ll definitely be sleeping in tomorrow. Tonight’s morale event was sponsored by all crewmembers from Texas. Steaks were on the Barbie, a lassoing contest was held on the flight deck, arm wresting in the mess deck and a ad hoc Texan movie on the flight deck followed. Good times were had by all. Texas Ranger Ford had the whole crew in laughter with his theatric pipes, he definitely earns my vote for future commentating.
Blogs
You want a day in the life? Try two really long ones…
PA1 Tasha Tully
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Start with a simple mooring to get fuel, fresh fruits and vegetables, and parts. This actually begins the previous night, finalizing the navigation plans and logistics which had been in the works for days. An early morning has everyone trying to squeeze breakfast around tasks and checklists, dragging out mooring lines and fenders, small boat checks, etc. The Captain gets reports that all is ready and the plan is set in motion; for a while. Repeated calls to the port finally let us know there was a problem with the paperwork. Questions like “What time zone are WE in today?” “What time zone are THEY in?” and “is that ZULU time?” are asked.
Postponed an hour due to the vagaries of time and distance we again approach the harbor… to find out that the time wasn’t really as much of an issue as the fact that there is a ship in our spot at the only pier we can fit in. We have the Portuguese translator talk to them to confirm when we can actually moor. His answer “after the ship is gone..” seem a precursor to how the Africa portion of our trip might go. We moor, set up anti-terrorism measures, take on fuel and groceries, misc. parts, off load trash etc. We then prepare to get underway that same afternoon.
Once underway we get news that our planned mooring the next day won’t happen because of a broken ship at the pier. Change one requires new plans which revolve around anchoring. Normally this is a small thing. This time it merely DEMOLISHES well laid plans to receive more than a dozen foreign VIP’s. Arrival ceremonies with side boys, speeches, tours, an official luncheon, departure ceremonies and the like now must be arranged around the use of a small boat and accommodation ladder. This done, those not on watch retire for a short nights rest.
Day two brings a fresh cup of coffee and the XO in the chow line saying “Mornin’ Chief, did you get the word…” It seems the American Embassy impressed upon the folks at the port that relations would be greatly improved if we could tie up to a pier. They are making the broken cargo ship move for us, now we are mooring. Change two isn’t really that bad, because it was merely reverting to plan A. It takes a while to get the cargo ship moved, which crunches our time just a bit to get everything set up once we moor.
Everything goes fine with the VIP shin-dig, but by the time we get underway everyone is pretty much dragging. Now, add the above example to the fact that we have been underway for 25 days. Throw a dollop of liberty into that (about 7 hours for 2/3 of the crew, 3 hours for the other 1/3). Add several portions of boardings and a barrel full of watches and you get a recipe for the following…
The Gift Pigs
The Pigs
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It started with a rather loud belch in the main passageway.
Sitting in the Chiefs Mess, SKC Clark heard this and commented “pigs in the passageway”. Another Chief who will not be named, but has his mind on retirement, simply said “really?” Creativity takes over and the SKC says that we gave our host nation’s VIPs plaques and things, so they gave us pigs. Turning down foreign gifts would be an insult. Oh, we’re probably gonna cook them; they’re down in the hold. After a few winks and nods, the other Chiefs confirmed that they had either seen them or heard about it.
A younger crewmember comes in and falls into the story feet first. He asks some others, while some of the Chiefs are behind him nodding and winking to get confirmation of the gift pigs. Meanwhile other Chiefs are spreading throughout the ship for a preemptive strike, talking to the Command and a few others to make sure everyone is on board with the story. While part of the crew is initially fooled, others remain so. As sailors will do, the only recourse for getting fooled is to perpetuate the story and make it bigger, and of course make someone else look more foolish than you just did.
Some who were in on the initial “confirmations” act with their own creativity. SK2 Wedll hops on the computer to do a little “cut and paste”. He superimposes pigs on a picture of the flight deck. Can’t argue with pictures, especially when they show you what you think should be there. When thing are printed in black and white it’s much more believable than in color. FS2 Holland and SN Gwinn grab a bag of leftover salad fixings to try to get one of the watchstanders to feed the pigs on his regular round.
FS2 Holland and FS3 Sweeny are cleaning up from dinner, and figure the leftovers if mixed properly would make a fine pig slop. This bucket of slop finds its way to the ladder leading down to the impromptu pig-sty. FS2 Holland then has a real brain child. Being small of stature but big on imagination, she places a bag into one of the large steam kettles in the galley. FS3 Sweeny then informs one of the FS1’s that not only did we get live pigs; they also gave us one ready to cook. Well, Holland jumps out of the pot squealing, and I only wish they had thought to get video.
There were many other participants, both on the giving and receiving end of this gag. The fact that many of us have actually seen or heard of things this weird makes it almost plausible. This is just an example of how sailors will find ways to entertain themselves.
Photos
MK2 Witko working on the salt water pump in the engine room.
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50 cal shells
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crewmember shooting the 50 cal
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One of 2 of Dallas' small boats
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the 76 cal in action
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crewmembers watching the CWIS in action
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crewmembers play "Jenga" with Snickers bars...not easy to win while underway!
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Crewmembers are issued their anti-malaria medication!
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a box of anti-malaria medication
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Chief's Mess. From L to R: MKCS Burkee, ETC Goslin, GMC Davis, ETC Feuge, DCC Insley, BMC Gouge, MKC Small, SKC Clark, HSC England, YNC Williams, OSCS McClain, ETC Blakeney. BMC Moerls & OSC Wifler "not pictured".
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